THE PERFECT HEART

One day a young man walked into the village square and declared that he had the most perfect heart of the whole valley. A crowd gathered around him and everyone admired his heart because it was indeed perfect. No stains, no defects. Yes, they agreed, it was indeed the most beautiful heart they had ever seen. The young man was proud and boasted even more loudly about his beautiful heart. 

Suddenly, an old man appeared stepped slowly out of the crowd and he said aloud: "Listen, your heart is not half as beautiful as mine." The crowd and the young man looked at the heart of the old man. It beat powerfully, but it was also full of scars, it had spots where parts had been removed and replaced by other pieces. But those didn't fit well and there were a few jagged edges. Well, to be precise, in some places there were deep ridges where parts were completely missing. So now, the people were staring at the old man and thinking, how can he claim that his heart is more beautiful?

The proud young man looked at the battered heart of the old man and laughed: "You're joking", he said, "To compare your heart with mine just doesn’t make sense! My heart is perfect and yours is a hodge-podge of scars and tears. "Yes," agreed the old man, " yours does look perfect, but I would never swap with you. Each scar stands for someone to whom I have given my love. I tore out a piece of heart and gave it to them, and often they gave me a piece of their heart that fit in the empty space of mine. But as you can see, they did not always fit perfectly, That is why I also have a few ragged edges. But I appreciate them greatly because they remind me of the love that I've shared.”

The old man continued, “Sometimes I got nothing in return. These are the empty slots that you can see here. Giving love also means taking risk. Sometimes those empty slots hurt and they remain open but they also remind me of the love I have felt for those people. I continue to hope they will return one day and fill in the open spots. Do you recognize now what true beauty is?" 

The young man stood still and tears ran down his cheeks. As he slowly walked toward the old man, he reached into his perfect heart, ripped out a piece and offered it to the old man. The old man took it and tucked it into his heart. Then he carefully took a piece of his old, battered heart and with that piece, he closed the wound in the heart of the young man. It wasn't a perfect fit so there were now a few jagged edges quite visible. The young man looked down at his heart. It was no longer perfect, but he thought it more beautiful than before because he felt the love of the old man run through it. He put his arm around the shoulder of the old man and they walked away together, side by side.

Author: The author is unknown but it is believed to be an Austrian folk tale.  If you enjoyed this story, accept it as a gift from Peterborough Storytellers, make it your own and tell it to others. That's the storytelling tradition. The Storyteller

LIFE LESSON FROM HUMAROCK, MA

A couple of weekends ago, I drove down to a creative storytelling workshop that was being held at a small bungalow right on Humarock Beach, a short distance north of Cape Cod. I joined eight other folks who were all passionate about the art of storytelling. Our leaders were two of the better known and popular American tellers, Jay O’Callahan and Marni Gillard. It was a wonderful weekend of telling and listening to life stories told by men and women who had actually lived the stories they told. Jay and Marni thoughtfully guided the discussion to create moments of sheer ‘aha’, insights into the lives of everyday people and families and little by little, the personalities of each of us.

There were few constraints placed on us by our coaches and over the course of the days and evenings, real people emerged from the many stories that were created and told. A key requirement was that after each telling, feedback was to be invited by the teller about any aspect of the telling experience that touched each of the listeners in some way. Jay and Marni gently insisted that our comments had to be appreciative in nature, not critical. During the feedback, the teller could not respond in any explanatory way about what they had said or created in the story line.

At first, we all felt a bit awkward in giving appreciative feedback to a stranger. I wondered how the comments could turn out to be anything but platitudes and neutral generalizations. After all, each of us had come to Humarock to learn more about creative storytelling, gain some performance skills and push our personal comfort zone about the making of stories and the public sharing of them. I remember thinking during the first round of appreciative feedback the first evening that this could be a very long weekend and not much worthwhile and authentic was going to happen.

But the sensitive, thoughtful and totally sincere appreciations that were shared by Jay and Marni and how they responded to our collective appreciations of their own shared stories, fostered a subtle shift in the initial awkwardness. To my surprise and delight, as each of us became more comfortable with the appreciative technique, both as a giver and receiver, deeper, more powerful stories of the human condition began to flood into our sharing circle. One dimensional story lines easily and somewhat magically morphed quickly into rich and deep characterizations with compelling story lines that grabbed your heart and soul and would not let you go. The appreciative comments provided the catalyst that evaporated long held hesitations, embarrassments, regrets and doubts while fresh, intriguing and energizing snapshots of each of our lives began to emerge. I became a willing beneficiary of the appreciative feedback. My stories became bolder, more vivid and more character driven than I ever remember them being in the past. I pushed my creative boundaries and I loved the emotional rush it brought to me.

It was a long drive home to Ontario from Humarock. Almost twelve hours, so I had a lot time to think about my experience and decide how I had been affected by it.

I realized that many of us are operating each day with our loved ones, colleagues, neighbours and strangers in a default, non-appreciative style. Disciplining oneself to be more appreciative of others, their actions, idiosyncrasies, strengths and failings is tough, unfamiliar, awkward work. It takes practice, lots of it. It takes time, lots of it. It takes appreciative feedback from others, lots of it. Giving genuine appreciative feedback to others can make us physically and emotionally vulnerable. And that’s really an uncomfortable place to deliberately put oneself time and time again.

I am going to take the time to invest myself into becoming a more appreciative person in my relationships. I will invite, consider and use appreciative comments about my storytelling and my writing.

Thank you my Humarock colleagues for an experience that exceeded my expectations in unexpected ways. Until next time…

Author: Don Herald (Member of Peterborough Storytellers) August, 2012

HERE’S A SHOUT OUT FOR IMAGINATION

At this month’s Storytelling meeting, I am leading a short little workshop called ‘Awakening Our Imagination’. After almost two years of listening and telling stories at our local chapter I realized just how powerful the gift of imagination is for each of us. We have some very skilled tellers in our local group and they always tell and perform stories that they have borrowed from somewhere or made up themselves. Every tale invites the listeners’ imagination to create a visual, emotional and psychological experience that is often compelling, always engaging and frequently intensely personal. That’s one of the things that I truly enjoy about the act of storytelling and the art of listening.

Take a moment and think about how your imagination affects your daily life. You have had some diagnostic tests and your doctor’s nurse calls to tell you that the doctor would like to see you tomorrow. No, not next week but tomorrow. ‘What time works for you’, she says? You set a time, hang up and then your imagination totally kicks in. Why the urgency? It must be something really serious otherwise there would be no rush to share the results with you. You go on-line and check out your symptoms for the twelfth time on one of those sites totally devoted to such things. You are now frightened almost to death. By the time you get to the appointment, you have already anticipated the diagnosis and it isn’t good. You make the decision to tell the doctor to forget the diagnosis and just tell you how much time you have left.

Or perhaps you are watching a favourite tv show and there is a tender scene that triggers memories that leaves the show to the PVR and you mentally enter that earlier real world experience and imagine how things could have worked out differently for you. Your family wonders what that odd smile is on your face.

Personally, there is a perfume that years later when I pick up its scent in a drug store, a donut shop or in a business meeting, I am immediately transported back to a special personal relationship. For that moment I am back there but I know that the video playing in my head has been nicely and thankfully re-arranged by my imagination.

Imagination is part of the software that is always running in the back of our daily lives. Without it, our lives would be mostly black and white images. Our dreams are playgrounds for our imagination. In my Storytellers workshop I offer this definition: Imagination is our ability to create images and sensations when they are not perceived through our sight, hearing or other senses.

When was the last time you had an up close and personal conversation with your Imagination?

So, dear readers, here’s a long overdue shout out to our IMAGINATION!

Author: Don Herald (Member, Peterborough Storytellers) August, 2012